I am awake early, she is still asleep. I get up, avoiding waking her. Start writing. All’s quiet, time to get into my flow.
She wakes, comes out all sleepy-eyed, says good morning, gives me hug. I tell her about what I am doing and carry on.
She’s in the kitchen, fiddling with some stuff… “Shall we have breakfast first?”. “Hmmm”, I say, concentrating, “before what?”. “Before we start”, she says.
Silence from me, I’m focusing.
“Shall we have breakfast first?” she says again!
Slowly, ever so slowly, it dawns on me. “Come here”, I say, “Sit down”. “Ooh”, she says, “Two commands, I don’t know which to follow!”.
I close my computer and hug her and say no more! We go back to bed, this time to wake up properly!
The questions? They aren’t important, they are just seeking attention. I was focused and not paying her any attention. I had started my day before she woke up. We didn’t wake up together and start afresh.
A woman needs attention all the time. If she’s not getting it she will find a way. Questions are a good technique.
Guys, you can ignore the questions, but don’t ignore her. Give her the attention she needs. Life will be transformed.
Contact
Beautiful Graham! That cuddling and waking-up again – apart from being very nice – served a much deeper purpose, and I’d like to shed some light on that.
SO much has to get done today: finish of my final draft, send it off, write a movie review, answer email, grocery-shopping, laundry, walking and feeding the dog and the three cats, etc. etc.
For a man, this would just be a matter of prioritising and focussing. For a woman it is’nt that obvious, cause EVERYTHING IS EQUALLY IMPORTANT.
So, there I am, standing in the kitchen, all this demanding my attention, me feeling totally uncertain, not knowing where to begin. Our morning ritual of greeting eachother provided me with a starting point – what’s next? If I start off now and have to break for breakfast, that’ll break my flow. Hence my question.
Graham not answering leaves me hanging in confusion – having breakfast first is my way of bringing order to the chaos. Then he asks me to do two things at the same time – more confusion. This could end up in tears soon.. Graham literally saved this day by taking the lead and directing me back to bed. It totally broke my pattern of overwhelm and grounded me again. I even have time to write this comment now:-)
Wow, Cheta. So much more than even I understood was going on…
See, men, never think you understand what’s going on!
But, of course, you don’t need to. Just understand the need to encompass her and ground her…
[...] Treat your woman like a Goddess, do everything for her, satisfy all her needs. Don’t question at this stage just fully embrace it. [...]
[...] Treat your woman like a Goddess, do everything for her, satisfy all her needs. Don’t question at this stage just fully embrace it. [...]